I’ve created an Idol drinking game, where you take a shot whenever Simon says “indulgent”. And take TWO SHOTS anytime anyone says “relevant.”
What I would have sung (if I had any vocal talent whatsoever and ended up on AI)
70s: Blondie’s One Way or Another
60s: Jefferson Airplane’s Somebody To Love (Trying to avoid ones that were done)
#1 Carly Smithson (aka Mick Overrated)
Bio: No way, she works at an Irish bar? Never would I have guessed…
I do love me some “Heart”. Do you think they had her go first b/c they’re so sure she will make it to the finals? I always wonder how they determine the order. Some of her scrunchy faces can get kind of annoying for some reason, but this isn’t a bad version of the song, and its a vast improvement over last week, but I am still not feeling her as the “girl they all have to beat”.
Paula’s Sage Wisdom: You can tell you love Heart.
1st Commercial (9 min)
#2 Syesha Mercado (aka Nadia Revisited)
Bio: DUANE, find me a big beautiful shell! Whoa. That baby cry was eerily real.
The beginning of Me & Mr. Jones seems a bit shaky, no? But she’s gaining some momentum as it goes along, although I find the rendition a bit dull. Regardless, I like Syesha, and she is safe for a long time if she keeps choosing song which allow her to hit some big notes.
Paula’s Sage Wisdom: I like it
#3 Brooke White (aka Herbal Essences)
Bio: She could sing while cutting hair. That could be a new salon gimmick.
Carly Simon is a good choice for her, b/c she has similar throaty vocals. But since it is “You’re So Vain”, you could infuse a little more anger, if that makes sense. LIke I never thought you were supposed to bounce around during the “clouds in my coffee” part. But overall, I enjoyed it. She could be a dark horse in the finals. She’s safe this week.
Paula’s Sage Wisdom: And everyone was digging it. I really loved it.
2nd Commercial (23 min)
#4 Ramiele Mataubay (aka Polly Philipino)
Bio: Hula dancing can also come in handy when stripping (can explain later)
Nice choice in speeding things up this week after last week. Keep em guessing. Decent, but I think she was too quiet on some of the notes, and the piece of hair in her eye, well, if that was me, that would have been driving me nuts the entire song. Could be vulnerable this week.
Paula’s Sage Wisdom: I feel like you didn’t get to perform your magic. / You’re right on, Ryan.
3rd Commercial (33 min)
#5 Kristy Lee Cook (aka Southern Fried Sacchrine)
Bio: That’s nice you enjoy being outside. What else were you supposed to do in Oklahoma? She is cuter in the hat, though.
Bouncy breasts can equal votes. But she needs to learn to bounce them without bobbing the head. It’s a skill. Better than that tripe last week. Her vocals were substantially better than before. Note: You’re no Good was during Linda Rondstadt’s country phase.
Paula’s Sage Wisdom: Fit in the pocket.
4th Commercial (43 min)
#6 Amanda Overmyer (aka Biker Hair)
Bio: She reads. But hopefully not while riding the Harley
Oooh, a few slip ups in the beginning, looks like she gets a bit confused at some points. I still can’t believe she’s 23. Looks a bit hard, ya know? Oh, there’s part of the guitar solo where I had to do my flag solo for competition (random Me info). Trademark yell. I applaud her desire to present something different, but it was not a good song choice. She may be in trouble.
Paula’s Sage Wisdom: You got some moves. You can dance.
5th Commercial (53 min)
#7 Alaina Whitaker (aka Over(it)wood)
Bio: Strange food habits. Actually, my brother-in-law also has a phobia of this and right now, he has probably declared her his favorite.
I hate this song in so many ways. She still looks way too much like Carrie Underwood. Picked up a bit in the middle, but in all actuality,
there is not a lot you can do with this song. She could be gone.
Paula’s Sage Wisdom: I forget how young you are and how mature you are at the same time (followed by unidentifiable gibberish)
6th Commercial (62 min)
#8 Alexandrea Lushington (aka Lil Funky Tomboy)
Bio: Playing up the dead firefighter father angle AND signing at Ground Zero. Good marketing
First off, I love this song. Have you ever seen the movie Three Kings? It’s one of my all-time favorites. Great use of this song in that movie. I like the fact she’s doing something kind of different, but if you’re gonna sing this, you have to really NAIL the “oooh oh oooohs”. May sabotage her, but maybe her bio will help persuade voters. I still like this kid. I really, really do.
Paula’s Sage Wisdom: I’ve always said you’re relevant.
#9 Kady Malloy (aka The Girl I Like Who Surprisingly Doesn’t Embody Everything I Hate)
Bio: Once again, I feel as if I am growing as a person because I love this girl. She’s a hot little blonde and I typically hate them, but I LOVE HER. She’s gorgeous and super talented.
Kick up the Heart a notch. I’ve always wanted to be able to sing Heart. She’s hot, too, and I think she’s got a brain and stuff knocking around in there. I almost want to make out (like in the what chicks do in college to impress guys at a bar sort of way) with her, except I think she’s like 17. I don’t care what the judges say! I LOVE KADY!! Wait…how has Simon never heard Magic Man before? I think they’re way too hard on her, to be honest, I think she’s exploring different music and having fun, why does she need to “define” herself when they get thrown with different genres/eras every week?
Paula’s Sage Wisdom: I think you have many hidden talents.
7th Commercial (77 min)
#10 Asia’h Epperson (aka I’m still thinking)
Bio: Bring it on, cheergirl.
I do not like this song for her, plus, its just a completely depressing song which should have been retired after Bridget Jones’
Diary. But she did get to display some power vocals, but I enjoyed last week’s performance from her much more. This didn’t do much for me
whatsoever.
Paula’s Sage Wisdom: The ending is what counts.
Disappointing, as I could not think of as many clever nicknames and Paula’s Sage Wisdom is so much better when she’s judging the men.
Top 6 (Women)
1) Carly Smithson (was the best tonight, to be honest)
2) Brooke White
3) Syesha Mercado
4) Kady Malloy
5) Ravioli Matulby (Polly Phillipino)
6) Asia’h Epperson
Gone: Alaina Whitaker & Amanda Overmyer or Alesandra Lushington
