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How else would you start a really crappy day on Wall Street?

October 10, 2008

On Thursday, Greasy Constantine and the cast of the off-Broadway ode to the 1980s, Rock of Ages, rang the opening bell on Wall Street.

In under 30 seconds, he still manages to convey his complete and utter douchiness. The man must literally have douche running through his veins.

4 Comments leave one →
  1. SHY330 permalink
    December 7, 2008 2:44 am

    wow i must admit dat was funny shyt and plenty of rockers have fucked their groupies and why is every1 calling him a wannabe jus becuz he can sing soul music doesnt mean he cant really love rock wat da hell do u not have a life 2 where u hsave 2 criticize people for being himself? DIS JUST IN….U PEOPLE R NOT GOD AND IF U LIKE IT OR HE IZ GONNA BE HIMSELF AND THERE R PLENTY OF THINGS THAT U HAVE DONE DAT U ARENT PROUD OF SO STOP WASTING UR LIFE BASHIN OTHERS

  2. muppet2171 permalink
    October 11, 2008 1:21 pm

    I just love how the one stock broker dashes forward to cover the bell as soon as Connie steps back…like he’s afraid our favorite idol *cough* was gonna jump back on it again…

  3. TopIdol permalink
    October 10, 2008 11:10 pm

    Wow. I think I almost wet myself after reading that. HA HA HA HA HA!!!

  4. SPOON! permalink
    October 10, 2008 10:46 pm

    This just in…

    Volatile Dow plunges as much as 697 points, rises as much as 322, as panicky investors try to find their footing after it is revealed that a wanna-be rocker has initiated a curse at the opening bell today.

    Man on the street says: “How can I help but panic when I see someone making that stupid rocker-devil sign on the trading floor. I’m scared. That greasy headed idiot set the curse. We are all doomed because of the panic he caused.”

    Broker on the floor says: “Only an idiot that gets off by fucking teenagers up the ass would curse the floor like that! The market crashed and it’s that weirdo’s fault. Evil signs in a bad economy…” (shakes head an tears up).

    Broker2 on the floor says: “My God! He had an ass-crack for a chin and left a slug trail of stank behind him! What the hell were they thinking letting that jinx in here?” (covers face with hands and turns away)

    Oblivious Reporter says: “Back to you Top Idol commenters!”

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