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Iffy Michael Jackson night spoilers

March 9, 2009

Ah, another riddle from a poster at Joe’s Blog. Whatever the contestants sing, it’s sure to be a trainwreck, perhaps a lot like last year’s Lennon-McCartney nights (And Chikezie never got enough credit for his incredible arrangement & performance of She’s A Woman).

I’m also not sure why a family-friendly TV show is championing a dude who is, more likely than not, a toucher. Yeah, yeah, yeah I know he was found innocent that last time, but the man is not right in the head. And if we’re gonna go with a theme night for a whack job Jehovah’s Witness, I would have preferred Prince. (Oh wow. Prince night on American Idol. Although I can’t see Darling Nikki being on any list of songs the contestants are allowed to sing. Damn.)

Anyway, here are the supposed spoiler riddles and my guesses. Since there is nothing remotely close to Beat It, I’m going to guess that will be their big group sing shit show, which won’t be so bad. Especially if they play rumble. There will be even inanity to ridicule.

Lil wants to keep us satisfied.
This must be The Way You Make Me Feel. Hmmm…I’m not sure, but now I have Death Cab For Cutie’s I Will Follow You Into The Dark in my head.

Kris is singing to all his fangirls.
Beat It? I kid, I kid. We already know Kris is gonna be beautifully-corrupted by the time his Idol run comes to a close. So let’s guess PYT (Pretty Young Thing)?

Adam is good – and you know it!
Too easy. Bad. Please say he does more than an quasi-crotch grab this week.  

Alexis is not ready to bid farewell.
I was really hoping it would be Blood on the Dance Floor. Just because I can’t stand this dumb twit and don’t give a rat’s ass what she’s going to sing.

Danny has to be careful of what he does in this round.
Uh…this one is pretty easy. Billie Jean, perhaps? But why even risk a song so memorably performed by last year’s winner. It also disregards his comments in a recent Top 13 Q&A with Entertainment Weekly. Guess he’ll go back to the old arrangement. (Some people have claimed he’s doing Wanna Be Startin’ Something and Jorge will be doing Billie Jean.)

Anoop’s doing this one for the ladies.
Please, please, oh please say Anoop will sing Smooth Criminal. (Alien Ant Farm arrangement, perhaps?) I know it won’t be In The Closet. Don’t Stop Till You Get Enough? Maybe The Girl is Mine? No clue, but does it matter? I adore Anoop!

Megan is a little wistful.
I am going to guess Remember The Time. Let’s hope she does a cool arrangement or something.

Jorge wants to give you a special feeling.
The Way You Make Me Feel is my guess. For some reason, that song doesn’t make me want to shove five Q-Tips in my ears, either. However, I am sure that’s what the spoiler for Lil Rounds also indicates, so I am going to guess a song called It’s The Feeling In Love, which was co-composed by David Foster, guaranteeing its inclusion on any Idol-Says-You-Need-To-Pick-From-These list.

Scott sees the benefit of we.
Maybe You Are Not Alone? (I really hate that song. And the beat doesn’t allow the chance for Blind Guy Moonwalking.) Or We Are The World, however, I’m really hoping this one is chosen for the shitty group sing.

Jasmine is contemplating some deep issues.
This sentence was supposed to be funny, right?  She’s young and she will do something crappy and sappy. Let’s guess Heal The World. Please say its not Human Nature.

Michael wants to assure you that he’ll be around.
I’ll Be There? That was almost way too easy. Er, I mean Got To Be There? I’ll Be There is the Hasseloff-penned and sung theme to Baywatch. My bad!

Allison may be a girly girl, but she’s got that spark!
Someone in the Dark has some lyrics about a spark. (Thank you, Google.) I hope she doesn’t light her hair on fire.

Matt is taking a long, hard look at his musical identity.
My first guess would be Man In The Mirror, but Kris Allen already sang it. So let’s go with Another Part of Me. (I have no idea what this is, mind you, I’ve just been referring to Wikipedia this whole time.)

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One Comment leave one →
  1. March 10, 2009 10:24 pm

    Sometimes, its just better to blog about the show AFTER its happened rather than before.

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