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Some married gal is trying to get her single friend to put the moves on Danny Gokey

June 11, 2009

Sometimes Google Alerts really delivers the goods.

A blogger / married mom / seminary grad student is pimping out her single friend. Said friend attended a church service with Danny Gokey (in Nashville). Blogger / married mom / seminary grad student thinks the single friend should have put the moves on him.

Yes. You read that correctly. And I know you want to know how it all went down, right??

Me: So Meridith, tell me where you were on Sunday morning.

Mer: I’m not funny at this. And then you’re gonna write this…no, that’s not funny…you’re gonna make up stuff…no, stop.

Me: Meridith, just tell me where you were on Sunday.

Mer: I was at church.

Me: Meridith, what church was that? Was it “Bedside Assembly?” The church you’ve been going to the past several weeks? The church with Bro. Sheets and Sister Pillow?

Mer: No, this was actually church church.

Me: Okay, Mer. What happened on Sunday at church that made you call me in a panic from the church parking lot?

Mer: Well, I was actually going to text you while everyone was giving offering but I thought that might be inappropriate so I waited to call you.

Me: And what did you call me about?

Mer: I wanted to tell you who was in church…who was only two rows in front of me.

Me: And who was that?

Mer: Danny Gokey.

* For those of you having trouble following us, Meridith is sitting in church with Danny Gokey. He is single. She is single. He sings. She voted for him.

Me: Meridith, did you enjoy your conversation with Danny?

Mer: I enjoyed the view.

Me: That is not what I asked.

Mer: I didn’t talk to him. I was respecting his anonymity.

Me: Let me ask you this…did he get up and speak at church?

Mer: Yes.

Me: About his stint on American Idol?

Mer: Yes.

Me: That’s not anonymity.

Mer: Melissa, he just started a foundation in the name of his deceased wife. I have a feeling he’s not over it.

Me: What exactly is your point?

Mer: I don’t’ know how to answer that question. That was my answer. I can’t be the silly girl that runs up to him and acts interested. Wait, don’t type that…stop it. STOP!!!

Me: Meridith, how do you expect me to marry you off if you won’t play by my rules?

Mer: I never asked you to marry me off. You’re not my father.

Me: Don’t get too serious, too heavy.

Mer: I told you I’m lame on paper.

Me: Meridith, you’re not lame on paper. You’re Andy Richter to my Conan O’Brian.

Mer: Okay, anyway…I didn’t talk to him because I didn’t want to be some pathetic groupie girl. I didn’t want to come across as needy. Desperate. One-without-a-life.

Me: But I had the perfect opening line.

Mer: I was not going to say that!!!

Me: All you had to do was walk up and say, “Adam – I loved you on American Idol. I voted for you the night you wore the snakeskin pants.”

Mer: (Laughs) I would have ended up saying something lame like, “I was so touched by your ministry.”

Even though that last statement sent a piss shiver through my entire body, I gotta give this Meridith girl a bit of credit for showing a bit of restraint and not trying to actively jump America’s Most Polarizing Dead Wife Guy.

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8 Comments leave one →
  1. June 11, 2009 11:13 pm

    (a) This is actually hysterical. Probably better her than one of the cougars that lives out here.
    (b) I thought your name was Melinda.

    • TopIdol permalink
      June 12, 2009 1:46 am

      Why…that may be my name???

      BUT I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!!! IT WAS GOOGLE ALERTS!!!

      • June 12, 2009 6:52 pm

        Oh my God. I’m an idiot. I thought you… nevermind.
        I don’t read sometimes. *headdesk*

  2. AIFan permalink
    June 11, 2009 9:48 pm

    If I had friends like this nosy bitch I would shoot them first.

  3. Pam permalink
    June 11, 2009 7:45 pm

    Pretty cute. I’d a jumped him, tho. How could she restrain herself? Yummy danny!

  4. June 11, 2009 7:32 pm

    Wow! I can’t believe you held back, girl! Life is short and Danny is smokin hottt…what was u thinkin???

  5. Lisa N permalink
    June 11, 2009 7:30 pm

    I felt the same way when I met Danny at the Hilton function a few weeks ago. I wanted to jump all over him…but how could I? He’s still grieving and I respect him (and myself) too much.

    If his circumstances were different, tho… He’s such a hottie and sa-weet as they come!

  6. Deez permalink
    June 11, 2009 7:29 pm

    Can you even imagine what a first date with Gokey would be like? I’m picturing Larry King Live….I’d wanna shoot myself in the head after about five minutes. If he made a heart hand at me, I’d shoot him first.

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