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SYTYCD Top 14 Eliminations: Another Brunette Bites the Dust

July 2, 2009

Is this the Michael Jackson tribute we heard about? An opening dance to Brand New Day from The Wiz with lots of feathers and stuff and Broadway Tyce?

SYTYCD do The Wiz (Brand New Day)

Kind of weak if you ask me. But really, I’m no one you should ask. I only write about this shit because it fills the Idol void, I loved it last summer and oh yeah, I want to be Cat Deeley.

Who cares? Cat Deeley looks like a stunning platinum goddess. I want to go shopping with Cat Deeley so very badly. Yes, yes. I do.

SYTYCD -- Cat Deeley is a platinum goddess

Karla & Vitolio
Randi & Evan

(One couple is in the Bottom 3)

Gotta say…Karla is rather dull, even for being a Broadway-experienced plant of sorts.

Randi & Evan are…SAFE. And Karla give HUGE bitch face. (But I gotta say, Caitlin should go home before Karla.)

SYTYCD -- Vitolio and Karla are pissed b/c they know what's going to go down

Janette & Brandon (If these 2 aren’t safe…)
Janette & Brandon are…SAFE

Powder & Kupono
Melissa & Ade

Melissa & Ade…are SAFE

YES! Powder & Kupono are in the Bottom 3. And Mia is SHOCKED. Hmmm…you know why they were in the bottom 3? BECAUSE NOBODY LIKES POWDER. And basically Mia said they can’t be lost, so obviously, you know they’re not going anywhere.

So of the remaining couples, I’m gonna have to go with Caitlin & Jason joining the others in the bottom 3. I will call bullshit if its Jeanine & Phillip, but he’s got a big fan base, so I have a feeling it will be the former.

Although Caitlin and Jason fans really turned out. I suspect they’re family. And when I mean they really turned out, I mean they’re wearing homemade tinfoil spikes.

SYTYCD -- Caitlin's "alien" fanbase

However, I really just want to boot Contempo Casuals Caitlin on fashion sense (and lack of defined movements) alone. Just because you have great abs, it does not mean you must wear tacky discount bin bras.

SYTYCD -- Jason, Contempo Casuals Caitlin and Cat Deeley

Jeanine & Phillip
Caitlin & Jason


Caitlin & Jason are…SAFE

Ok, then Karla & Vitolio better get the boot, because if they get rid of Jeanine and / or Phillip, I may just give up on this show for the season.

Jeanine & Phillip better stay. I love them. They are adorable. And Jeanine is a BRUNETTE! (You know they’re not going to boot the lone blond in the Bottom 3, but I wish they would stop shoving her down our throats because she is obviously not a fan favorite.)

SYTYCD -- Phillip and Jeanine! Love them!

Some contemporary ballet for the folks at home…from Patricia and Desmond Richmondson…

SYTYCD Professional Contemporary Ballet People


She just twirled around a bunch and shook her hair around a lot. Although I would really love to see Powder go over here just because I don’t want to lose another brunette.

Here Comes Goodbye

Vitolio may have been a bit better, not sure. Odd song choice.

Kayla / Powder

Yeah. Well, she is stupid…anyway, I don’t think it was the point of the song. Clearly, this girl can only do things with her legs because that is all I’m seeing. Leg extension, leg extension, roll around into a leg extension…

Somewhere Over The Rainbow

Smart move, Hawaiian boy, dancing to this song. Although I didn’t see him do much, granted, I was typing. I bet Kupono can get action with any man he wants. Just making an observation, but he would be the King on any Pride float.

Moonlight Sonata


And The Goddess Cat Deeley, of course.

SYTYCD -- Cat Deeley and Jeanine

You’ll Find A Way (Switch Remix)


And while the judges deliberate…

Kelly Clarkson will perform I Do Not Hook Up.

Yes, I do love Kelly Clarkson. I didn’t discover her until 2 or 3 years after Idol, but yes, I adore her. Her music often speaks to me…SHUT UP.

Kelly Clarkson sings I Don't Hook Up on SYTYCD

And I don’t care if Kelly gains some weight from time to time, as long as she doesn’t balloon up like Wynonna Judd or something. Or the one Wilson sister. She’s too young. But honestly, Kelly Clarkson is pretty normal looking, which is refreshing. And she hasn’t had any mental breakdown or public relationships with crackheads, so hey, she’s doing pretty damn well for herself. Even people like myself and others who don’t listen to a ton of “pop” music have nothing but respect for this girl. And yes, as soon as her latest album was released, I totally downloaded it.

Ok…now for the unceremonious booting…


Please don’t go!!! Please don’t go!!! YES YES YES! They said she had the strongest solo of the evening!


This is awesome, 1980s British Hair says she is one of the judges and choreographers’ favorites, yet tonight she sucked…BECAUSE she was STATIC and just threw in A LOT OF KICKS! Yes! Have we now discovered why Powder gives off the illusion of being so damn good? Can’t she just go be a Rockette or something?

Powder looks pissed…or like she’s gonna cut a bitch.

SYTYCD Kayla looks like she might cut you

Of course Karla goes home. Because she is brunette and because she doesn’t have this “star quality” they had hoped for. And I’m sure Vitolio will be going home now…just because…he’s not Kupono or Phillip.

NO NO NO NO NO…please keep him…YES! Even if they think he needs more work on other forms of dance, they will keep him. Well…hello! You can’t break up Jeanine and Phillip.

Uh oh…he just has a great presence…

Weak solo…he just stood on stage and smiled, I guess…he needs more passion…and of course…

That’s what we’ll be expecting from you next week

I knew it. They had to boot the couple they liked least. And hello? Didn’t I tell you the Quickstep meant DEATH?

I’m going to miss Vitolio. I’ll miss him a lot more than Karla, but hey, no one ever said this show was fair…and hell, Vitolio is crying and talking about the emails he’s received for inspiring people. Karla, obviously, she didn’t really inspire people.

And the first one out there to hug them? JEANINE.

SYTYCD -- Jeanine hugs Karla

Because JEANINE IS AWESOME. Caitlin just looks confused.

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