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SYTYCD Top 10 Elimination Night Recap:

July 22, 2009

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I am SUPER behind.

Amazingly, I don’t even know who got eliminated, although I think I know who may be the girl going home…but yes, I am completely clueless at the moment.

But I love Cat Deeley’s sequined dress.

Group Dance
So Much Betta
Janet Jackson (Choreographed by Amanda Robson)

I guess if you can’t so a Michael Jackson night, you must improvise and secure the rights to songs performed by other Jackson family members.

I couldn’t even figure out which female dances were which, although I think the shocking-white face glaring at me from those black Lady GaGa outfits was Powder, but seriously, that stuff was all sorts of confusing.Well danced, I guess, but I was a bit confused because I couldn’t figure who was who.

Awwww, let’s relive some of the glory which was last season and talk about the Emmy nominations. SYTYCD received FOUR! Of course, Emmy voters are tasteless asshats, as Battlestar Galactica never received any Emmy love and Cat Deeley has still not be honored by a nod in the Best Reality TV Show Host category.

Last season…so much better. Although I don’t think I ever cared much for that Chelsie girl, oh, you know me. I tend to only root for the girls with brown hair.

OMG. NO 1980s BRITISH HAIR!!! Nigel is receiving an honorary degree in Bedfordshire, England. Guess that’s a decent enough excuse. The Goddess Cat Deeley declares it Ladies’ Night. If anyone else would do that, I would role my eyes and snort. That’s the power of Cat Deeley. She can make that sort of lame statement fresh and loveable. WHERE IS HER EMMY NOMINATION, PEOPLE? WHERE IS IT?

Ok…recap from previous night’s show…of which I only watched half…missed the dancing milkshake comment. But I gotta say I wish Debbie Allen was on here more often. She is all sorts of fun.

Darling, you handled your big woman, baby!!!

Yeah. That may be one of the greatest statements ever uttered on this show.

Awwww, Ade’s Pick. How beautiful was it that Ade’s Pick got his own dance?

Maybe I will go back and watch the second half after this…does anyone else notice how Melissa is one of the strongest dancers when it comes to conveying emotion in her face? Jeanine, Janette and Melissa are definitely my top 3 girls.

The Bottom 2 Girls…

Janette is SAFE! Good job, voter people.

Randi is…not safe. I think she knows her time may be up.

Randi Evans knows she is going home on SYTYCD

OMG. What is Powder wearing? I mean, I know dancer clothes are not like regular people clothes but seriously, why did you commit a homicide against chiffon?

What the hell is SYTYCD Kayla wearing?

Jeanine is SAFE!! Yay! Although it was rather easy to see how this was going to pan out via the arrangement of the girls on stage.

I’m sorry. I just cannot stand Powder. And I cannot believe she is SAFE over Melissa. Have the judges finally succeeded in shoving Powder down the viewing public’s throats? Because I believe she was in the Bottom 3 couples at least 2-3 times, no?

Even when she looks goofy, Cat Deeley is still the Goddess.

Cat Deeley -- Always a goddess

Filling time with pre-taped Season 6 previews. I already am not digging this Molly girl who is already getting a bit too much screentime, ya know? In two minutes, I already know how her family moved from Utah (Mormons!) to California so she could get more auditions. To be fair (and brutally honest), Molly is a good dancer and she looks A LOT better while dancing because she whips her head around quite a bit and you can’t get a good look at her face or hear her speak. The kid is 18, but she still looks and sounds even younger.

Another teenage mormon dancer from Utah will be on SYTYCD

All I’m really wondering while watching this little filler bit is if the awesome red-head girl (Season 3 Katee Shean’s good friend)who has tried out the last 2 seasons and got UNFAIRLY chopped in the early rounds of Vegas was instructed to come back in the fall when viewership will be higher? I loved that girl. She was robbed.

The Bottom 2 Guys

Jason is…SAFE!! (Go, Rickey!)

Evan is SAFE! This kid has one helluva a fanbase.

Kupono is not safe. Go over to the uncomfortable stools, Kupono. Yes, Goddess Cat Deeley, what an outfit, that’s for sure.

What was SYTYCD Kupono wearing?

Now I do already know how this pans out. Ade is also in the Bottom 2. Bastards. Are you kidding me? Ade and Ade’s Pick should NEVER be in the Bottom 2! NEVER. And Brandon is safe. Anyway, I guess we can skip along now since I’m also assuming this would mean Kupono is the one sent packing?

Ade is also on stage with Ade’s Pick. Love him. (Hey…why did they do the whole suspenseful Bottom 2 thing between the two black guys? Racist much?)

Will it be Ade or Brandon Bryant in the bottom 2 on SYTYCD?

(Next week will have Mia Michaels as the guest judge, Ellen DeGeneres is going to show up and then past favorites will return along with Tom Cruise’s slave girl in honor of Thursday being the 100th episode.)

Dream (Priscilla Ahn)

Yeah, she is going home. There is no way Melissa is going home over this girl. No way. Wow. She was NEVER in the Bottom 3 before? Yeah, she’s going to be one of those that goes home the first time out because they did fly under the radar, just as Crazy Mary commented. Debbie Allen is taking a page out of the Paula Abdul playbook by commenting how lovely Randi looks tonight and then fully admits to just hating the Paso Doble in general. I love Debbie Allen. I love it when she cops to wearing a weave. I love it when she calls people child. MORE DEBBIE ALLEN! MORE DEBBIE ALLEN!

Marina Gasolina (Bonde Do Role)

Yeah…his time is up. I like Kupono, though. And he’s a very good-looking guy. He’s also gayer than Xmas, which is all good, because I think the dude can have his choice of other hot men. I don’t care if he’s gayer than Xmas. Do any SYTYCD viewers care if the male contestants are gayer than Xmas? Or non-white? I don’t think so, which is why I think she show is superior to American Idol in many ways.

Gabriel (Lamb)

No way in hell Melissa is going home. Naughty, 29-year-old ballerina STAYS. And hello? So enamored with Cat Deeley going down on the ground to start talking to her after the dance. Yes, yes. I totally tard over Cat Deeley. I totally admit it. I am a Cat Deeley tard. Debbie Allen thinks Melissa has spoiled everyone by being so good and wants her to give more in her solo work. Crazy Mary does not talk, perhaps because of time restraints or because the SYTYCD Drink Refiller called in sick and she has to go pour herself another drink before coming back to give her opinion on Ade’s solo.

Unchained Melody (Righteous Brothers)

No way is Ade going home. I am not losing Ade or Ade’s Pick this soon in the game. No way. Plus the dude does mad gymnastics. Listen to the crowd. AMERICA WANTS MORE ADE AND ADE’S PICK. Crazy Mary obviously swigged straight from the bottle backstage and is screaming over the audience how ADE IS A STAR.

Damn straight. Black Eyed Peas…skip this shit. It’s not that I completely loathe their music, per se, it’s just…they’re just…Fergie bugs. And she’s dancing with a sex toy. And the one dude is wearing a Thriller jacket, which I assume are now back in style. And then some chick starts bopping around on stage in front of them and all I care about is finding out whether or not she has chola brows.

I hate the Black Eyed Peas

Ok. Time for the real elimination. Randi goes home, expectedly so. As does Kupono. I think America kind of got it right this time.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. July 23, 2009 2:54 am

    This made me giggle.

  2. Nancy permalink
    July 23, 2009 12:25 am

    I love you—–thank you for posting this.

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