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The Glamberts got PWNED

October 1, 2009

That’s the second time I’ve used that word today. Pwned. I don’t even like that word, but hey, sometimes it just fits.

No Adam Lambert song in the 2012 preview which aired on about 700 different networks this evening. Nor did it pop up on the extended trailer. They’re even barraging this poor Sadao Turner with horrible Tweets. Here’s an example:

@SadaoTurner, you now owe us your fucking SOUL. Or Adam’s first single. Your choice.

Disaster movies almost always suck (Sans Armageddon, which still sucks, yet I still harbor a deep affection for Harry Stamper and his motley crew of roughnecks, as well as Shuttle Cmdr. Willie Sharpe and Billy Bob Thornton’s gimp mission control man, Truman. Yeah, screw you. I’ve probably seen Armageddon around 150 times.), this one is BEYOND BAD. It’s so bad, it must be a parody of disaster movies. I’ve only seen five minutes of this tripe but I can already tell you it almost makes the worst film of Spielberg’s career, War of the Worlds, look believable.

I assume Woody Harrelson plays the crazy renegade. And clearly, John Cusack is the estranged husband of Amanda Peet’s character, who has taken up with a more “stable” man (i.e., isn’t “obsessed with his career”, which is obvious given Cusack shows up to their house in a stretch limo.), and the new “stable” boyfriend must go with them as they try to escape the destruction of the ENTIRE FRAKING WORLD. (Stable New Boyfriend will inevitably die or sacrifice himself to save the others, giving Peet and Cusack the chance to reconcile before finding some safe haven amongst the remaining other survivors. The children won’t die, given the children of main characters in disaster films never die.)

The Glamberts are LIVID.

this is ridiculous 😦 when do we hear anything from Adam Lambert? I am going to cry now

Well then. Please cry. I’m not gonna stop you.

I can’t take this anymore, literally. I’m in tears right this very second. I can’t be hyped up and excited anymore. I am literally in tears!

That lady can go ahead and cry, too.

I’m in tears…it meant so much to me to hear Adams new song. I need a break too. From now on if it isn’t tweeted from Adam I will not believe everything I hear.

I hope all of you stocked up on Kleenex.

Well “2012” imma let you finish, but you should have played Time for Miracles because you just pissed off a heluva lot of Adam Lambert fans!

The person who Tweeted that shit uses a photo of Lambert in Black Rock City as her avatar. Grrrrr…

Oh wait a second. She’s not done.

OK everybody – just know you are not alone. We are all in this together. Sleep tight and don’t let the bed bugs bite. 🙂

Since the Glamberts got majorly pwned, they’ve moved onto some insane rumor Lady GaGa dumped Kanye West from the Fame Kills tour so Adam Lambert would be her opening act. (This rumor began in the Twitterverse, like all rumors do.)

i hope it is NOT true. Adam is a STAR and ADAM should be the one headlining. If he did a benefit or whatever …fine. But a tour??? I would be SOOOO disappointed.

I’ve always wanted to live in a universe parallel to this one, too.

I am praying Adam does NOT do this. He should be no one’s second string. I am tired of him as second! He is a star in his own right. Let his fans prove it by buying up the concert tickets for his own concert where he is the STAR not Lady Gaga. That means another short half hour set while she stars in a big one and who knows how long her tour would last. I would love for Adam to be out on his OWN tour a year from now or sooner! I don’t care if he is a world star as long as he is a star here.

Tears…prayers…all over some guy who doesn’t know who you are? Sorry, I don’t get it. Then again, my mother, as a teenager, thought it was strange how girls would scream and cry over The Beatles. We just don’t get very fanatical like that in my family, granted, my dear mother always has some very amusing quips about Albert Pujols’ thighs…and whenever the Cardinals would play the Dodgers in the late 80s, she would always point out the beauty of Steve Sax’s ass.

BTW, if Adam did end up as someone’s opening act, be it Lady Gaga or whomever, that’s not a bad thing. The Beatles opened for numerous acts early in their career, most notably Roy Orbison, and they turned out OK. Adam will get his headlining shot if not now, then perhaps for his second album.

Stop bringing The Beatles into this.

The source on IDF who gave the ahead of time info about what the concept was for the RS cover shoot, and also knew what day Adam would be attending Hair before he even came to NYC just said he’ll be opening for Gaga now that Kanye’s out. She also said that TFM will be featured in the 2012 roadblock. Grab your saltshakers, but she’s been dead on in the past.

Sounds like your “source on IDF” sucks donkey balls.

Oh ladies, just relax. Just as the great Scarlett O’Hara said, Tomorrow is another day. Even IF the sun doesn’t come out.

atleast the forcast is for rain tomorrow and i get to use my new adam umbrella!!

Is it this umbrella? Or this one?

Adam Lambert Umbrella

(Also, could someone fill me in on what a Globert is? I imagine they are another fan group, much like the Glamberts, Glambs, Lamb Skanks, et al. I’m convinced Lambert fans have more sects than sex.)

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51 Comments leave one →
  1. cimi permalink
    October 6, 2009 2:05 am

    I didn’t read all the posts cuz I’m, tired. From what I did read though—the only thing I have to say is, I agree with TI…Adam should fell lucky (and so should his fans) that he gets’ to open for GAGA. Glamberts, gloworms, or whoever should be old enough to realize that everyone has to pay their dues. I know they would probably come back at that comment with, well, Adam has already paid his dues but, wake-up! nu-uh…he may have paid his dues in the cabaret/theatre/gay bar arena but, he hasn’t yet in the real-world.

    From my perspective, Adam is in a great place and he most likely feel terrific to be where he is…globerts/glamberts/glambskanks/lambskanks et el should be ecstatic. They need to grow up a bit and not get to ahead of themselves.

  2. October 3, 2009 12:35 pm

    Ok.
    You need to go outside and STOP tracking Adam tard activity.
    It’s getting unhealthy.

    • TopIdol permalink
      October 3, 2009 12:50 pm

      HA.

      Hey, I went out last night…and I’m going out tonight! So there!

      It’s raining today. So I’m online browsing clothes I can’t afford.

  3. kimberly permalink
    October 3, 2009 1:20 am

    “Are you always this stupid or is it just a seasonal thing?” — Idletard

    Why do remarks like this bring me such pleasure? Much appreciated.

  4. kimberly permalink
    October 3, 2009 1:12 am

    I find it funny that last year at this time Lady GaGa was struggling to make it. I recall her doing those Radio Jingle Balls with David Archuletta. Who knows what next year will bring. Here today, gone tomorrow. It’s a bitch if it’s not about the music. At least she’s got one thing right, “Fame Kills”.

    Adam Lambert will be paying his dues just like GaGa and Perry and all the newbie artists. I’m sure Adam’s vocals are stellar on the song and I do believe Brian May and Meatloaf were impressed. But, I also believe it’s purely promotion. May, Meatloaf are hyping the song for Cavallo. If it wasn’t Adam, it would have been someone else they’d be talking up. It certainly is a great opportunity for Adam, but honestly there’s plenty of singers who could have fit the bill. They’re all expendable.

  5. Sherena permalink
    October 2, 2009 7:54 pm

    The first tweet is funny. Whoever tweeted it meant it to be read with a sense of humor…

    The rest… yeah I won’t go there

  6. bmms permalink
    October 2, 2009 3:11 pm

    Yes, I will admit… the Glamberts are saddened. Yet, there is so much to look forward to from Adam.

    BTW TopIdol, the Globerts are Adam’s international fanbase.

  7. Nich permalink
    October 2, 2009 11:46 am

    I don’t revere the Beatles like most people but damn I wish they would quit it with the Beatles comparisons. And the Elvis. And the everyone else who ever became a superstar and let the man make his own way in his own time.

    • deez permalink
      October 2, 2009 12:46 pm

      http://twitpic.com/jxsq4

      What’s the deal here? Shouldn’t it be Adam doing this?
      Kris isn’t beating their album sales!!! This is just NOT RIGHT.

      • Claire permalink
        October 2, 2009 1:06 pm

        LOL! Please tell me the Glamberts on MJ’s/TWoP/wherever aren’t already saying this.

        • deez permalink
          October 2, 2009 2:18 pm

          Nah…thought I’d beat them to it…but I haven’t actually checked, so it’s a distinct possibility.

  8. kimberly permalink
    October 2, 2009 11:43 am

    Let me just say, after reading the above, I have never had lunch with a self-medicated Lambert fan, merely a self-medicated friend. I needed to clear that up. Thanks

  9. kimberly permalink
    October 2, 2009 11:41 am

    I think it will be Perry and Gaga on tour.

    Today the world will be overrun with self-medicated Lambert fans. If you see a woman nodding off into her Cobb salad, it’ll be a Lambert fan. It’s really quite a spectacle, hilarious and horrifying at the same time, watching a forkful of food in a slow trek to wide-open mouths, lids half-mast. You find yourself rooting for them. Almost! Almost! I’ve been tempted to just walk out and leave them sitting there alone…)

    Which leads me to this: I saw a Carrie Fisher interview. I really love the woman’s sense of humor and she really is a terrific writer.

    She describes her target audience: “gay, mentally ill, Sci-Fi alcoholics.” LOL

    Her thoughts on celebrity: “…just obscurity biding its time. It’s all going to run into a wall. I never had any illusion about it.”

    The Glamberts, Lambskanks, Globerts, et al need to get perspective.

    “Obscurity biding its time.” Best quote ever! Something to think about.

    • TopIdol permalink
      October 2, 2009 12:02 pm

      I still find it funny Perry released a song referencing Reno (with a decidedly “casino” theme) following Gaga’s Poker Face.

      Slot machines : Texas Holdem :: Katy Perry : Lady Gaga.

      Perry merely sings about kissing girls while Gaga is rumored to be something from a Jeffrey Eugenides novel. It’s almost as if they’ve been positioned as Budweiser and Bud Light from the beginning.

  10. Shakethepoet permalink
    October 2, 2009 11:41 am

    Rumor one: I think it would behoove the filmmakers NOT to release the song prior to the release of the movie. This will ensure good box office on opening day when thousands of die-hard Lambert fans flock to their nearby theaters to enjoy their adamgasm en masse.
    Rumor two: This is actually something I would enjoy seeing; GaGa and Lambert seem like a good concert circuit match. Powers that be are you listening? I suppose not.

  11. Mary permalink
    October 2, 2009 10:25 am

    An Adam/Lady Gaga tour sounds terrific to me, and probably to Adam as well. Even though he’s already a rather big star he still has to pay his dues; being a sensation on Idol does not translate into huge sales and sold out venues, all of his predecessors on Idol have had to crawl up the ladder themselves. I think Adam knows it, even if his crazier fans don’t.

    I follow Ryan on Twitter and once in a while he will post unfounded rumors that end up not being true, I guess same goes for his team. It’s one thing to post that you’ve heard Britney is pregnant again, but if you tell people to tune in at a certain time to see the premiere of a new song and they watch a 5 min clip for nothing, you’re going to reap what you sow.

    • TopIdol permalink
      October 2, 2009 10:38 am

      If one thing, it probably helped promote the “Roadblock”, which was aired in a sweet prime time spot to begin with, therefore guaranteeing ample viewership. However, the announcement of Lambert’s song being included not only guaranteed the small (in comparison to the rest of the country/world) contingency of Lambert fans would probably help in bumping up the numbers for the Fancast.com views of the extended trailer.

      Probably all planned. Who knows. Who cares. It’s over. And it didn’t happen. The song will debut in due time. People will survive until then.

      Unless the world ends…

  12. mika permalink
    October 2, 2009 9:59 am

    I’d pay a lot of money to see a Lady Gaga & Adam Lambert tour. A lot of Adam fans ~like Lady Gaga, so I don’t get all this negative response? The whole tour is BS though, I wouldn’t count on it. Some blogger made that rumor up.

    That whole Time for Miracles thing was insane. I wish they’d aired even just 10 seconds of that song, but I’m not angry. Disappointed, yes, but I’m not crying tears over it. That IDF troll who ~knows things also said Adam was bi. Um, no. Take everything with a grain of salt.

    Furthermore, if Adam WERE working with Lady Gaga, he’d have tweeted about it by now. Seriously.

    • TopIdol permalink
      October 2, 2009 10:35 am

      There are Constantine Maroulis fans (Can you believe he still has them?) who continuously assume he will be collaborating with fellow “Jersey Boy” Bruce Springsteen.

      I saw a lot of backlash against the whole Gaga-Lambert pairing. Partly because she’s “trash” and “OMG HE IS A HEADLINER”. I’m not a Gaga fan, but if that actually turned out to be true, it might help him avoid the standard pitfalls of Idol winners. And I would hope they would then stuck HBD on a similar path.

      Seriously, though. This shit was basically started because some Glambert HOPED he would tour with Gaga since the announcement about Fame Kills being, uh, killed was made. Let’s say Obama wanted to add a position in his administration, say LGBT Czar, they would assume Lambert would be the obvious choice.

  13. Liz permalink
    October 2, 2009 8:28 am

    No, girl, fans of Adam are allowed to do and say anything, regardless who gets hurt in the process. The law doesn’t apply to them.

  14. girl from mars permalink
    October 2, 2009 8:16 am

    I’m soooo tempted to bait some sparklecows on Twitter now. Also, I’m not a lawler or anything, but isn’t it illegal to make death threats like they’re doing?

  15. mandy permalink
    October 2, 2009 7:25 am

    You know what? I am a HUGE Adam fan. I am very excited to follow his career. But I have got to say, I can not even bear to go to Adam’s public timeline on twitter without hand palming my face. And I can not stand how if anyone at all posts anything about Adam, they get bombarded with a zillion tweets from a certain group of people. I bet Adam does not even look at his @replies anymore!

  16. October 2, 2009 7:12 am

    Is @Sadao Turner one of you Top Idolers? If so I have to report your non-Time for Miracle wind-up stunt to the SPoCG (Society for Prevention of Cruelty to Glamberts). Then you will know about it!

    • October 2, 2009 6:45 pm

      Are you always this stupid or is it just a seasonal thing?

    • freedavidcook permalink
      October 6, 2009 10:18 am

      Can we just pay all you Adam-goofs to walk off the nearest cliff or drown yourselves in the sea to spare the rest of us from your obvious insanity. I know, I’ll start a rumor that Adam flew to the bottom of the Grand Canyon and his sparkly magical flying love enables all his followers to fly too and he’s waiting for them for a massive orgy at the bottom. The frau stampede over the edge would be massive, the seismic activity might actually throw the earth off it’s orbit. But it would thin the herd.

  17. Steph permalink
    October 2, 2009 6:17 am

    5 minutes of no Adam Lambert. Oh I’m laughing, really. I’m laughing at the people who take it so personally. Dude, it’s a song. You’ll hear it EVENTUALLY. They would have been equally as mad if they had only heard 30 seconds in a long 5 minute clip. That was long enough to play the whole song.

    But damn, I forgot 2012 isn’t about Adam Lambert! The world ended for the creepy Glamberts last night as they went to sleep with no Adam Lambert, and all I can think is, damn, get a grip.

    On an entirely other note, I’m disappointed that my love John Cusak signed on for this bullshit. Lots of stuff will blow up…and that’ll be about all.

  18. Isidra permalink
    October 2, 2009 2:38 am

    Holy crap. I can understand being disappointed about the promo, but the messages to that guy are too much!

    If this kind of thing keeps happening, people might decide to stop talking about Adam altogether, and that could kill his career. Right now, buzz is all he has!

  19. LOL WOW permalink
    October 2, 2009 2:14 am

    You DO realize a lot of those tweets were sarcastic, right? Like the SOUL one.

  20. Mysterioso permalink
    October 2, 2009 1:34 am

    I don’t want to see this crap movie or hear the stupid song on the end credits.

    I am total homophobe, and a hater, but I know film and music. I have the right to judge this movie and song before hearing and seeing them. This will push this movie and song to #-1 on the charts.

    Tanxbai

  21. Claire permalink
    October 2, 2009 1:04 am

    Now I’m reading theories that TFM wasn’t included in the roadblock because it would no longer be eligible for an Oscar if it were to be played before the movie’s release.

    • October 2, 2009 1:13 am

      😆 I love frau conspiracy theories

      ‘OMGSZZZZ!!! THEY COULDNT PLAY IT BECAUSE OTHERWISE IT MIGHT CAUSE ANOTHER EARTHQUAKEE!1111eleventyhundredandone!!!”

  22. d. b. cooper permalink
    October 2, 2009 1:02 am

    Why don’t they just pre-order the crap out of the 2012 soundtrack as a protest/show-of-Glambert-power? That’d show those movie producers.

    Also, Allison Iraheta’s first album should be called Cigarettes & Firewater. I’d buy that on GP.

    • Bubba57 permalink
      October 2, 2009 1:29 am

      Cigarettes & Firewater..I like it haha

    • Claire permalink
      October 2, 2009 1:09 pm

      I like it. Jive had better not Miley her up. No offense to Miley.

  23. Lil Lulu permalink
    October 2, 2009 12:26 am

    “way to rub it in top idol. I really am leaving to do hw now this time. i promise.”

    Way to go, TI. Now you’ve upset Lauren before she’s finished her homework. If she flunks, it’s on you.

    As for the 2012 premiere, what kind of homophobe wouldn’t want to see that movie?

    Now excuse me while I go pour alchol down my throat to help ease the pain of no Adam music topped with the thought of him actually OPENING for Lady Gaga. Apparently, I misunderstood. I assumed that, since Kanye was no longer available, she was out panhandling for jobs. I presumed that Adam, in his kindness, agreed to take the poor thing under his wing and let her ride his coattails to fame. When I learned the rumor actually involved him opening for her, I fainted. Never a dull day as an Adam fan!!!!!!!!eleven!!!

  24. deez permalink
    October 2, 2009 12:26 am

    ” my dear mother always has some very amusing quips about Albert Pujols’ thighs…and whenever the Cardinals would play the Dodgers in the late 80s, she would always point out
    how Steve Sax’s ass.”

    Yes!!!!! Your mom is awesome.
    Any mention of the Cards/Pujols automatically negates any Glambert ridiculousness.

    • TopIdol permalink
      October 2, 2009 12:40 am

      She usually ends by saying, with a sardonic chuckle, well, if he ever meets me he better run real fast.

  25. Bubba57 permalink
    October 2, 2009 12:26 am

    Yeah for allison–either have her open with Paramore or Pink..though, Allison loves Pink, and Pink/allison are both kick ass strong woman

    • Verbally Dyslexic permalink
      October 2, 2009 12:32 am

      I think Allison should at some point share a stage with Heart. Or Joan Jett. While she fits more with Paramore and Pink in terms of music demographic, somehow to me her musicality seems to ring closer to the older female rockers.

      • Bubba57 permalink
        October 2, 2009 12:40 am

        That would actually be cool..but I see Jive going with an act that is huge right now on Top 40 radio and share the same audience…

        But Joan Jett or Heart with allison would be rockin’

  26. Verbally Dyslexic permalink
    October 2, 2009 12:23 am

    The OTT fans are out to commit mass murder. Or suicide. Either way, I want front seats to the show.

    I am now looking at the fact that Adam Lambert is on the soundtrack of a disaster movie in a whole new light. A glitter tsunami is about to drown us all. We Were Warned.

    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!

  27. Bubba57 permalink
    October 2, 2009 12:02 am

    usually most of the idols do opening tours: Daughtry/Bon Jovi- that helped their careers, Jordin/britney, archie/demi… Its important to be an opening act first, get your name out there and create some buzz.

    My dream tour would be Pink and Allison. 🙂

    • SarahBeth permalink
      October 2, 2009 12:06 am

      Pink and Allison touring together would be awesome, I agree!

      And IT, class I dont think, is one of the strong suits of OTT fans. They seem to forget what filters are.

      • TopIdol permalink
        October 2, 2009 12:06 am

        I could see Allison opening for Paramore.

        • Bubba57 permalink
          October 2, 2009 12:13 am

          Paramore and Allison would be awesome too

        • Nich permalink
          October 2, 2009 11:53 am

          That would be freaking awesome. I’d see that show.

  28. Bubba57 permalink
    October 2, 2009 12:00 am

    Topidol, a Globert is basically glamberts from around the world: global glamberts or something…

    I knew something like this would happen…That guy who tweeted that info, should have never done that, cause now he is going to get bombarded with hateful tweets from these fans..which is so asinine..make yourself to look more like OTT, crazy fans.

  29. October 2, 2009 12:00 am

    They are going bezerk.

    @SadaoTurner dont think U will live till the end of this year,better start packin ur shit!

    Well, @SadaoTurner, you now owe us your fucking SOUL. Or Adam’s first single. Your choice.

    @SadaoTurner WE ALL WANT TO KNOW HOW YOU PERSONALLY PLAN ON SUCKING 2,000,000 PENISES

    I’M GOING TO KILL YOU IF I WERE YOU I WOUDN’T SLEEP.

    @SadaoTurner you just crushed my hopes and dreams, EVERYTHING IS A LIE. fuck you 2012 preview, FUCK YOU! #IWANTMYTFM

    Real classy

  30. Lauren permalink
    October 2, 2009 12:00 am

    way to rub it in top idol. I really am leaving to do hw now this time. i promise. i can’t believe they are upset about a Gaga/ Lambert tour. Of course I would want to see Adam as the star but you know what, she is more famous. Oh yeah, and it’s her tour! goodbye, i will most likely comment tomorrow and hopefully more rationally

  31. SarahBeth permalink
    October 1, 2009 11:54 pm

    I knew the meltdown was going to be glorious.

    And as for the tour? Seriously, opening WOULD NOT BE A BAD THING. God, Daughtry opened for Bon Jovi and now he’s huge and doing an arena tour. Good things come to those who wait. If Adam is paired with the right person (Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, etc), it could be very good for him.

    As for those who live in the alternate universe who believe it revolves around Adam, sorry to inform you, but it doesn’t. Please to be going back to the glittery planet you came from.

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