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SYTYCD Season 6: Top 20 are revealed (and I just now watched it)

October 26, 2009

Since June or July, I have regularly left the few readers I have with an unfulfilled promise — to write regular, on-time recaps about So You Think You Can Dance.

And I always fail. Face it, I suck at life. Or at least writing SYTYCD recaps. While the magic of Jeanine Mason and Philip was a beautiful thing, not to mention the hottest head ornament since Quatto–Ade’s Pick–and obviously the exquisite beauty and unrivaled emcee skills of my girlcrush, Cat Deeley, you would think I would be all over this crap.

Meh. I think I just keep expecting it to be Season 5. I think it was season 5? Or 4? I dunno. It was the first season I watched, and it just happened to have the most awesome Final Four EVER. While I will always adore Jeanine, Phillip and Ade (+Pick), the latter two did not make the final four…and I don’t care how much this show wants me to love some vapid blond Mormon clone of Kherington Payne (who was overrated in the first place), it’s not gonna happen. And no Final Four will ever touch the awesomeness of Joshua, Twitch, Katee and Courtney.

The things I loved about SYTYCD seem to be disappearing, replaced by things I hate, most of all the bullshit eliminations. Hello? Natalie, Katee’s friend? Yeah YOU. YOU WERE ROBBED. And Ryan Kasprzak. ROBBED. Instead, SYTYCD has been sticking this teenage blond plant (from Utah, of course!) named Mollie down my throat since LAST season. There was some krumper who bowed out during choreography in the early rounds this season who was flat out AWESOME. That was the most exciting thing I’ve seen thus far. But he’s out. And there are a bunch of contemporary dancers who bore me to tears. I can only watch someone roll around on the ground and leap with such deep emotion so many times. And please, SYTYCD–unless you can give me a Bollywood routine as technically perfect and all-out incredible as the one performed by Katee and Joshua, then stop doing Bollywood. Because no other dancers have been able to do the style any justice.

So I’m watching the Top 20 show because I think I have to before tonight’s episode, because I will once again try blogging consistently about this crap. The Top 20 show is rather anti-climactic since its about five days old. Mia Michaels is gone–sad, yes. But now I understand why I keep getting umpteen hits of people searching for Mia Michaels hair. She buzzed that shit…leading, of course, to unsubstantiated rumors of a cancer diagnosis. And I’ve already seen who makes it, so…And today, chosen one Billy Bell dropped out due to illness, replaced by Brandon Dumlao. Maybe Billy Bell got hired to do Billy Elliot, because I can’t look at the kid without wanting to call him Billy Elliot (or as Jim Cantiello astutely refers to him, Billy Belliot).

Likable young guy makes it…a bunch of people don’t make it…holy hell I want to kill this curly-haired brunette named Kathryn McCormick who has the most irritating voice and won’t stop crying. I hate her. I hate her dress. Actually, her entire outfit blows. Just because you’re wearing cowboy boots with tights doesn’t mean its on trend. Yikes. Even Mia’s like, bitch shut your whiny trap and don’t wear gray tights with red, white, blue and brown.

STYCD-Mia-Michaels-Buzzcut

Whatevia. They let this girl through. And she makes more annoying, inhuman sounds before finally walking away in her uber-stupid outfit.

SYTYCD-Torture-Tears-Kathryn-McCormick

Her are the Top 20, courtesy of MJ and her very Big Blog.

Nathan Trasoras – 18 – Contemporary – Mia gives him a big spiel about being too young, but the fake out isn’t very convincing.  He’s thrilled to make it.
Kathryn McCormick19 – Contemporary – She never stops crying, mostly about her family.
Channing Cooke18 – Contemporary – My Boston homegurl makes it. Nigel tells her she needs to work on chemistry with her partner.
Ariana Debose18 – Contemporary – Blink and you’ll miss her. Cannon Fodder
Ellenore Scott19 – Jazz – They kinda blew by her too, but no way this brilliant dancer is fodder
Billy Bell19 – Contemporary – Will have to put off his Julliard education (scholarship, no less) for SYTYCD.
Russel Ferguson 20 – Krump – He’s a very versatile krumper who swears he’s never been trained (Don’t believe it!) He’s the first ever krumper to make the Top 20.
Kevin Hunte 23 – Hip Hop – Hip Hop dancer, and cannon fodder, I’m afraid.
Bianca Revels20 – Tap – Nigel lays the fake-out on thick on the oft-rejected Bianca. But she’s finally in!
Phillip Attmore25 – Tap – Another tapper. He was super defensive during Vegas. He makes it.
Peter Sabasino22 – Tap – Is there room for a 3rd tapper?  Of course there is!  Oh Nigel telling Al Stewart jokes. Yikes.
Victor Smalley21 – Contemporary – Blah blah blah…he’s in, despite the judges hating his hair.
Jacob Karr19 – Contemporary – That was fast! Blink, and you missed it.
Mollee Gray18 – Jazz – Perky dancer from Utah.  She hurt her foot in Vegas. They put her in the Top 20 despite her “childish” dancing.
Pauline Mata 19 – Jazz – She injured her ankle in Vegas,  but still, she makes the cut.
Noelle Marsh18 – Contemporary – Was cut in Vegas Season 5. Is buds with Mollee Gray. Season 6 is her year.
Legacy Perez 28 – B Boy – They fake him out, and he falls for it!  He’s in the Top 20
Paula VanOppen – She makes the Top 20…but…
Ryan DiLello28 – Ballroom – He’s hot. Ryan and his guns make the Top 20
Karen Hauer27 – Ballroom – She’s so much better than Ashleigh. What?
Ashleigh DiLello 26 – Latin Ballroom – Wife of Ryan. Damn, she’s in! Because Paula VanOppen turned the Top 20 down for a movie role.

Brandon Dumlao — Yay! ASIAN DUDE!

I am going to root for north-of-Boston homegirl, Channing Cooke, and will have to see about the rest. Channing Cooke also has the most athletically-perfect body, she makes me want to go do wall squats. Maybe I will. I like Nathan. And as to be expected, I will rip Mollie Gray and Kathryn McCormick to shreds every time I watch this damn show. I will probably also root for the “old” people, because I, myself, am ancient by STYCD standards.

Cat Deeley is awesome. I love her. I hate Mollie Gray. I may decide to hate this Noelle Marsh person because of guilt by association. Imagine sharing a room with Mollie, Noelle and Kathryn McCormick. I would fling myself off the nearest balcony. They took these lunatics over Amber Jackson??

Ok. I’ll say something positive. You know who else I kind of love? Debbie Allen. The next time I cry, I want Debbie Allen to be there so I can curl up in her lap. And she can pat my head and say, ooooh, child, it’s all gonna be okay. It’s gonna be okay, child, just wipe those tears away.

More random thoughts…I’m doing this quickly…

There is no way in hell Russell Ferguson never had any formal training, but I like the guy.

Tap dancers : SYTYCD :: Gay people : American Idol — Closeted-but-not-closeted-tapper Evan Kasprzak became a fan favorite last season, just as open-but-not-openly gay Adam Lambert drove thousands of menopausal women into insanity, forcing them to call anyone who does not like him homophobic. He comes in second. Idol drops Paula Abdul and picks up beloved gayelle Ellen DeGeneres. Evan’s popularity (you guys are still bastards for not taking his brilliant brother Evan this time around) forces SYTYCD into loading up on tap dancers. Tap is the new gay.

We’re halfway down but we haven’t brought out Mormon Mollie Moron to panel, which frankly is just more evidence as to this idiot’s plant/pimpage status.

If I ever meet John C. Reilly, I will cry and ask him WHY WHY WHY WHY THE FRAK DID YOU MAKE A STUPID VAMPIRE MOVIE? YOU’RE BETTER THAN THAT SHIT JOHN C. REILLY. WHY WHY WHY???

Where is Sonya Tayeh? I haven’t seen her in FOREVER. I love Sonya Tayeh!!

Oh noezzz, Mormon Mollie Moron time. Why are they letting her talk? And she’s dressed as poorly as Kathryn McCormick. And MMM’s little friend Noelle TOTALLY has Kelly Kapowski hair!

SYTYCD-Noelle-Marsh-Kelly-Kapowski-Hair

Do you people think its 1991? Did you buy a time machine just so you could go back and shop at Contempo fraking Casuals?

SYTYCD-Ugh-Mollie-Gray

At least 1980s British Hair told her she danced like a 14-15-year-old. She is a stunted woman-child from Utah who feels entitled to a spot because she was a featured dancer in one of the High School Musical movies. I don’t know who I want eliminated first, her or Kathryn McCormick. What if people just keep Torture Tears around so she WON’T cry?

I might like Pauline Mata. Yes. I do.

Is it just me are do the majority of the contestants have ZERO personality? I miss you Jeanine and Phillip. And Ade. And ADE’S PICK.

I know I am always ragging on Utah. I shouldn’t be so judgmental. I know there are parts of Utah which are beautiful, even if they only sell 3% beer and have the lowest number of smokers per capita. I’ve never been there. I should shut up. And I know a few Mormons who are awesome, but come on! Why are they always doing reality television and why are the girls always blond? It’s like Children of the Corn shit, which is almost as freaky as the Joseph Smith stuff. All them have blond MILFs.

I own a Wii. Why don’t I use it more?

To all of you who think I hate pale females with blond hair, well then, explain my love for Cat Deeley? (And Megan Joy and now, Channing Cooke) Granted, she has a healthy glow. And has natural-looking brown low-lights.

After Ashleigh made it to the Top 20 with her husband, Ryan DiLello, everyone cheers. And MMM was DROOLING. Because she is a child. And she still drools.

SYTYCD-Mollie-Gray-drools

I know. I am being rather childish right now.

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9 Comments leave one →
  1. unknown permalink
    December 11, 2009 5:48 pm

    i’m sorry if you have a thing against blonde mormons on tv, but they are some of the nicest and selfless people you will EVER meet. not only that but mollee was a beaultiful dancer. sure she could use a bit of growing up but obviously so can you. if you’re going to be critical about someone, do it in a more aproroate way rather that flat out saying you hate her just for being blonde and mormon. people like you shoud keep your mouth shut if you’re only going to rip people apart for no real reason other than to make yourself feel better.

    • TopIdol permalink
      December 11, 2009 6:18 pm

      I never said I hated her b/c she was Mormon. I just assumed she was Mormon b/c she lived in UT and nearly every dancer on this show is mormon for whatever reason.

      I couldn’t stand her because she was annoying AND the way the judges shoved her down our throats. I thought she was pimped out way too much, sorry.

  2. Unkown permalink
    November 25, 2009 3:43 pm

    you need to shut up and stop talking about people! Also watch your mouth!!! Kathryn is my cousin and the nicest person in the world!!!!

    • TopIdol permalink
      November 25, 2009 3:53 pm

      I like Kathryn. She’s become one of my favorite dancers of the season. She freaked me out a bit when she cried in the beginning, but I loved the pairing of her and Legacy.

  3. Kimberly permalink
    October 27, 2009 2:08 pm

    Did that guy Sex audition this year? I didn’t see all of the audition episodes. He is a guilty pleasure.

  4. d. b. cooper permalink
    October 27, 2009 1:18 am

    Finally, you bring us the SYTYCD:-}.

    This was easily the worst episode of the season so far, hopefully the worst all season. It seemed like with every single person they put through they tried to fake us out, and with all of them you knew they would make it. It’s a tired conceit. They need to just stop with the fake-out, or use it sparingly.

    The people I watch this with all love Molly. I definitely think she was taken out of the incubator too soon. Russell seems like the odds-on favorite. I love Pauline, mainly because she’s the cutest thing ever. So I’m pulling for Pauline and Russell early. It’s clear that Russell will be able to pull off ballroom, along with everything else. But I usually end up loving about 18 of the 20 dancers.

    Early hatred goes to all the tappers, but thank god one of them isn’t Ryan Kasprzak, I couldn’t deal with that dude. Annoying and with a massive ego that could not be contained. The tappers all seem to have a chip on their shoulder. I pray Bianca doesn’t last long, but three years of pimping will probably go a long way.

    Now that Billy Bell is out of the competition, him and Shankman can start their affair. I don’t know if there’s a winner in that situation. Barely Legal Zits vs. Tragic Tanning Booth Accident.

    The producers should team up Legacy Perez with Kathryn McCormick. They could bring back Alex DiSilva to choreograph for them and they could collectively drown him in their tears. A fitting end for the scumbag.

    I like Channing Cooke. Mollee and her seem to have football player mentalities. Go out and execute, play through the pain.

    Karen Hauer = bangin’. Wow.

    They probably should have pulled the trigger on Paula Van Oppen in season 5. With her looks if she has any acting talent this was bound to happen.

    Ryan is Dmitri 2.0, the whole shirt thing is tiresome, but not as tiresome as those faces Ashleigh pulls. When I think of them as a couple, I get the feeling that they probably have the cleanest house in the world.

    I have to disagree with MJ that Kevin Hunte is cannon fodder. I’ll guess he’s probably top 10, maybe top 6.

    Nathan reminds me of Ted Logan (Keanu in Bill and Ted’s). Which is awesome, since he can now avenge Ricky Palomino’s first week ouster from season 3.

    Too bad Alex Wong didn’t come back this season. That would have been cool.

    Also some comments on your comments:

    • Debbie Allen gives me the warm fuzzies as well. If they were dead set on adding a fourth judge I wish it had been her.

    • More Sonya Tayeh, please.

    • Cat Deeley doesn’t count.

  5. Smartie permalink
    October 26, 2009 9:27 pm

    Hater.

    Is it me or does the spelling Mollee infer that person must be over exuberantly happy? Like you say it MOOLLLLEEEEEEEEEEE as though she’s a game show contestant and she’ll come bounding to you like an overexcited labrador puppy?

    Of course, that could be just me.

    Never watched this show so I have nothing further to add other than DROOLER FTW! Because if she’s drooling already, chances are she’d be so liquid she’d be afloat by the time the finale comes around, and wash away all the SYTYCD frauen.

    • TopIdol permalink
      October 26, 2009 10:01 pm

      You know me too well. You know me way too well.

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